Gratitude Changed Everything (Even When Nothing Else Did)

“No amount of regret changes the past. No amount of anxiety changes the future. But any amount of gratitude changes the present.”

I read that quote from a friend recently, and it hit like a truth I didn’t know I needed.

In this season of healing — where I’ve had to sit in the ruins of my own choices, wrestle with the silence of goodbyes I caused, and stand face to face with grief and guilt — gratitude wasn’t the first thing I reached for.

Honestly, it wasn’t even the fifth.

I reached for avoidance.

Then self-blame.

Then numbness.

Then silence.

Then the hope that maybe, just maybe, if I said the right thing, someone I hurt might come back.

But gratitude? That came later.

It came slowly.

And then, all at once.

It showed up in the quiet after I shared my story — in the “me too” from someone who had never said it out loud.

It showed up in the messages from people who were hurting and trusted me enough to say, “I don’t know why I’m telling you this, but I needed to.”

And it showed up when I realized: they weren’t just healing through my words — I was healing through theirs.

That’s the thing about gratitude:It doesn’t erase the past.It doesn’t guarantee the future.

But it anchors you to the only place you can actually do anything about — the present.

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.”— Philippians 4:6

That verse didn’t make sense to me at first. Gratitude felt like pretending I wasn’t hurting. But slowly, I learned it wasn’t about denying pain — it was about inviting peace into it.

And in the present, I’m learning to be thankful.

Not just for the mountaintops, but for the valleys that taught me who I am.

Not just for the love I once had, but for the pain that made me ask God who I’m becoming.

“Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”— 1 Thessalonians 5:18

(And no — it doesn’t say for all circumstances. Just in them. That distinction matters.)

Not just for the people I’ve helped — but for how they’ve unknowingly helped me back.

I used to think that sharing my story meant giving away parts of myself.

Now I realize: it multiplies. It doesn’t drain you. It frees you.

“Let the redeemed of the Lord tell their story…”— Psalm 107:2a

(We weren’t meant to carry it all alone — or in silence.)

So here’s my simple encouragement today, to you and to me:

Gratitude doesn’t have to be loud.It just has to be real.

Thank you to the few people who’ve read these blogs.To the ones who’ve replied with a story of their own.To the ones still quietly reading and nodding along — you’ve helped change me more than you know.

And thank you, God, for giving me the courage to speak the truth out loud, instead of hiding it inside.

Healing isn’t always loud.Sometimes, it sounds like a whisper of thank you in the middle of the storm.

“The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.”— Psalm 34:18

I didn’t need to be loud. I just needed to be honest.

For me, that honesty came after a lot of prayer… writing thousands of words no one will ever see… and then a gentle but firm push from God to try and do something greater.

This will never reach thousands or millions of people — I’m no big influencer. But I have faith it will or maybe even has reached at least one person that needed it.

Who am I? I’m just a guy who decided to own up to his mistakes — and trust that He knows what He’s doing, because I sure don't.

And for me, working through them meant saying it out loud.